Abyss of Loops
by Craxnor King
Summary: He can't escape. He just doesn't care anymore.


Abyss of loops

Chapter 1

He woke up again.

It was always the same.

The same orange glow. The same blinking lights. And the same doctors and agents running around informing Misato that he had woken up. He could already feel the bomb collar on his neck.

How many times has that collar killed him? Shinji lost count after 548, and that was around 900 cycles ago.

Maybe this time he could just fake being awake and sleep. Just spend this time sleeping. It's not like he needed food or water. He would just end up back here anyway so there was no point.

Even so, just regaining consciousness he was only faking his eyes closed. But Ritsuko and the WILLE doctors all knew differently. He knew that his brainwaves would show that he was fully conscious and no matter what he did he couldn't fool them into thinking that he was still asleep.

He tried that before it never worked.

But he didn't care. He just wanted to sleep a bit more before this hell began again so he kept his eyes closed and tried, being the key word, to drift to sleep.

But of course knowing he was awake Sakura was already trying to awake him. Shinji opened his eyes and looked around in a bored manner as he saw Sakura and the 4 armed guards ready to shoot him if he did anything dangerous.

Like start another Impact for example.

Before they scared him. After being killed by them over 50 times they barely made him flinch.

"Subject seems to be awake and conscious." She said.

"Subject can also hear you." Shinji retorted.

She looked surprise by his sarcastic remark and the four guards shifted in their stance waiting for an excuse.

"Ah… well, yes." She stammered.

"Tell me do you know what happened to you last?" she questioned.

"I shot myself." Shinji replied.

That gained wide eyes from the guards and Sakura. Unnerved by his response Sakura looked at a loss of what to do. "Subject appears to be under the delusion that it shot itself."

"No I definitely shot myself." Shinji responded. "It was quite interesting too because I used a shotgun not a handgun. Thought that the change in firearms might make the difference."

Now the guards were just looking at each other in confusion. Sakura was at the point of just wondering what was wrong with him.

"Tell me, do you recognize this person." She pulled up a mirror and showed him his face.

Shinji sighed. Of course he knew who he was, honestly it was just stupid at this point. "It's me."

"Ah, good subject seems to recognize himself at least."

"Subject would also like to not be asked stupid questions." Shinji said sarcastically.

The transport that he was on stopped and now the hover bed he was on led him into the main control of WILLE's ship. It was all dark, scary, and mysterious that with the many red lights and dark colors one would think it was the head of a wild creature.

Shinji thought it looked stupid. With no main light source and all of the conflicting screens it was just asking for someone to trip and break there neck.

Which he had done about 8 times.

"Captain Subject DM03 is within custody." Sakura said to Misato.

"Good, release the restraints." She commanded.

Ah finally, Shinji thought. As soon as the restraints were released he flipped himself over and laid his head down on his arms for a makeshift pillow. This way he could at least comfort his head while he slept. Even if his arms grew a little asleep while doing so.

He already knew that the entire crew was looking at him. Each one with the look of utter contempt on their face. Except Misato and Ritsuko of course, Ritsuko refused to acknowledge him as a persona and Misato couldn't look at him without succumbing to her own guilt. A long time ago that used to hurt him. In fact he remembered spending cycle after cycle trying to rebuild their relationships and trust hoping that he could rebuild or at least redo the life he had before. Hell there was a time when he would spend a single cycle trying to get to know each and every member of the crew in hopes that he could succeed in the next cycle.

Now he didn't give two shits what they thought about him.

"Ummm, subject seems to be… off Captain." Sakura continued.

"What do you mean?" she questioned and turned to Ritsuko. "That is Shinji Ikari, correct?"

"Yes his genetic makeup and all of his bio-signs show that he is the Third Child." Ritsuko explained. "Though his behavior does not match up to his records."

"Trying to sleep." Shinji said

Misato ignored him. "Then is the DSS Choker ready?" she asked.

Ritsuko nodded and modified the trigger handing it to Misato. "The code is directly under your supervision Captain." She clicked the standby option and the choker sprang to life with its annoying beeps.

"Trying to sleep." Shinji muttered again.

"The hell is that really him?"

"Sure doesn't act like the one I remember."

"Probably just playing aloof so he can catch us off guard."

"Oh for the love of," Shinji jumped off the bed and began walking towards the quarantine bay. "Can I just go to the quarantine bay now?" He said to Misato gaining a surprised look from the rest of the crew.

Misato jus waved her hand motioning for Sakura and the guards to take him away.

"Finally can get some sleep"

[EVA]

After the whole firefight with the drones and WILLE's ship flying into the air Shinji was brought to the interview chamber where Ritsuko, Misato, and Sakura were all waiting.

Before Shinji would try to talk with them, other times he would try to provoke them, then sometimes he would try to just be quiet.

He decided to be inventive this time.

"Ritsuko you looked better when your hair was longer." Shinji quipped noticing the annoyed glare he received from the doctor.

"Also Misato trying to emulate my father doesn't help attracting other guys." Misato narrowed her eyes. "Unless you and Ritsuko are a thing, which makes sense." Shinji could here teeth grinding.

"I mean two self-righteous, hypocritical, gloomy, women have a lot to talk about once they notice how much they have in common right?" Shinji saw Misato get up then Asuka walked through the door.

Watching her in silence she stared at Shinji with hate in her eyes.

"It's been 14 years idiot Shinji." She hissed.

Then she walked to the Plexiglas window and punched it with her full strength cracking the glass. She was trying to scare Shinji and used it as an excuse to vent her rage. Shinji responded in kind.

"You look like shit Asuka."

Rage ignited in her eyes, well _eye_ , and she stepped onto the counter looking down on him trying to be imposing but looking like an idiot from his standpoint.

"Are you making fun of me!" she yelled.

"Yes." He answered.

"Why you little. You have no idea what we've been through! No idea what we've suffered!" she yelled accusingly.

"Oh yes please continue to rant on and on how you've suffered and it's all my fault." Shinji deadpanned. "Nevermind the fact that if it wasn't for me you all would have been dead a long time ago. Right Misato?" Shinji taunted.

The surprise looks on their faces would have been worth it if it wasn't for the fact that he had done this over 100 times already.

"Yeah lets blame Shinji for the Third Impact, it was _all_ his fault. Right Misato?" he continued. "It's not like I don't know, I had a guardian who told me to _follow my heart_ and influenced me to save Rei and unwittingly without any knowledge on my part start the Third Impact."

"Y-You little shit, you _knew_." Asuka accused while the others were stunned in silence.

"Of course I knew." He said

Asuka then broke the glass separating them and proceeded to beat him senseless. The fact that no one in the room would stop her was proof that she was probably going to kill him.

Whatever. Maybe this time he'll stay dead. If not he'll just figure out a new way to die. Being beaten to death by Asuka without her Evangelion hadn't happened yet so hey what could go wrong.

[EVA]

He woke up again.

Shinji sighed. "Here we go again."

 **Authors note**

 **Ok first of all I didn't plan on this it was just a spur of the moment thing. And I thought it was an interesting idea.**

 **This is a Shinji who has done everything involving Time Travel. Or to be more specific he's stuck in EVA 3.0 no matter what. He has won, lost, died, suicide, and died from old age but no matter what he always ends back in the same place. To be more specific he has done this 3,864,052 times. That's around 31,000 years if EVA 3.0 was just 3 days. And that's not counting all of the other times he lived until old age. Basically Shinji doesn't give two shits anymore and is just trying to figure out how to end it.**

 **Also rant time. Everyone besides Nagisa and Gendo are a fucking retard in 3.0. I mean props goes out to Misato who even admits to herself that she is partly to blame but would rather put all of the blame on Shinji to make herself feel less guilty.**

 **Yeah I mean this is a 14 year old with emotional issues that tried to save one of his only friends only to unknowingly start the third impact, lose said friend, lose 14 years, get alienated by his other only friend, is ignored by his guardian, and has a bomb collar put on his throat. And with all of these people, all of these scientist, and all of these soldiers. Not a single damn person thought of this one thing.**

 **Lets sit down and talk to him about what happened.**

 **If they just did that then everything would have been fine. As simple as that everything would have been fine. It's like the characterization of all of these characters was taken and thrown out with dumbasses. Because that's what they were they were dumbasses.**

 **I mean if they took three seconds to think about the situation rather than just blame Shinji then they would have realized that if Shinji hadn't destroyed the 10** **th** **angel they would all be dead. They owe their lives to Shinji, but they're too busy being self-righteous and mopey to think straight.**

 **I won't be surprised if Shinji doesn't try to shoot himself in the finale. Honestly I'd be happy for the guy, he won't have to deal with those dumbasses anymore and can move on.**

 **All they had to do was sit and talk to him. Why didn't they just sit down and talk to him.**

 **I know this is a rant and I'm sorry about not updating King of Souls this was just a spur of the moment thing.**

 **Just review and share your opinion on It if you want or whatever.**


End file.
